Reinventing Yourself at Midlife

Reinvent Yourself like a butterfly

If you’re not happy with where life finds you, and daily you yearn to be able to change your life, don’t accept all the hardships thrown at you, or allow yourself to go to the grave until you have gone on to reinventing yourself.  Too many baby boomers reach midlife feeling completely dissatisfied with where they find themselves in life.  Things don’t have to be like this, allow that strong longing inside of you, those thoughts that you’ve buried but never lost, your desires to make this world a better place and your life one of contentment to begin to materialise once and for all.

“I lost everything at 47 but suddenly had a second chance at living.” Larry Lewis

Brendon Burchard provides some magical words to keep asking yourself to motivate you to keep going, keep pushing, keep working on developing yourself and the outcomes you produce. These words are:

  • Have you lived?
  • Have you loved?
  • Have you mattered?

The Retirement Confidence Survey released in 2013 by the Employee Benefit Research Institute reports that:

  • 60% of workers aged 55 and older have less than $100,000 in retirement savings.
  • 43% of workers aged 55 and older have less than $25,000 in retirement savings.
  • 36% of workers aged 55 and older have less than $100,000 in retirement savings.

A poll by AARP says that 70% of baby boomers expect that they will have to delay their retirement plans, while 50% fear that they will never be able to give up their 9 – 5 job.

With the fact that life expectancy is now around the age of 84 this puts a lot of pressure on midlifers and many see their prospects as being bleak.

There comes a time when signs of physical change, illness, or unavoidable signs that you are aging wake you up to the fact that you’re now middle aged and not only have you a finite amount of time left ahead of you but you are worrying more about how you’ll survive and about the legacy you will leave. It’s time to set about reinventing yourself

You’re reflecting on the choices you’ve made, the life you have, and what the future may hold. So now is the time to take action before life passes you by. I’m telling you that you must take the chance to create a life, where you avoid the regrets of taking your last breath without achieving your dream and creating your legacy.

‘Midlife is no longer about winding down. It has evolved into a phase of maintaining health, preventing and detecting stuff that can kill us, and managing whatever problems we do have.’ Fortune Magazine.

So many baby boomers that I meet seem to be drowning in problems:

  • Financial worries
  • Health Concerns
  • Job and career pressure
  • Not enough time for themselves
  • Conflict in their relationship

But internally, going round and round in their minds are even worse feelings:

  • Fear of their future prospects
  • Discontent with life
  • Boredom with their life
  • Questioning the meaning of their life
  • Confusion about who they are
  • Uncertainty of where life is going

Yet a few lucky ones of us see midlife as bringing us the opportunity to write a new chapter in our life creating a turning point where we make the final part of our life the best part of it, they know the importance of reinventing yourself. I see my role being a coach that can help other baby boomers like myself navigate their midlife journey.

In order to do this the fundamental question at midlife is to figure out who we are and who we want to be.

Many of you think back to when you were younger and wonder how do you get to that life you really thought you’d be living by now. Well don’t let those frustrations constantly bring you down, stand up now and tell yourself ‘life can be better than this’ and promise yourself you’ll no longer stand by seeing life pass you by and your dreams remain dead.

If you are frustrated that you’ve not achieved those things you wanted in life, see a glimmer of life ahead, your opportunities and possibilities are behind that crack in front of you, now start doing the things that are going to enable you to smash your way through.

Are you prepared to do what is necessary to change your life from where it is? Well let me give you a few suggestions of the things you need to do.

  1. Dream Big Dreams

I love to use back from the future thinking. Imagining life as though it’s perfect in the future and then working your way backwards seeing how you got there. So you need to create a vision of a truly brilliant future that you can create in your dreams. No more small thinking, use your visualisation power to capture the perfect life of your dreams, the way you want it to be in say 5 years’ time. Once you get this vision in your mind, imagine you are now on a national TV interview show and you’re being interviewed by your favourite show host, and hear you tell him or her what you’ve done in these last five years to reinvent yourself.

  1. Do What You Love To Do

Find something you love to do and then a way to make money from doing it. I know this whole concept sounds to good to be true. But isn’t the truth that you’ve for too many years than you care to remember been doing a job that you don’t enjoy, that seems to suck the energy out of you. They say it’s insanity to continue doing the things that you know aren’t right for you, so be brave, after all what have you got to lose, you are already completely dissatisfied with your life, so start to explore the possibilities, first what would you love to do, and second how can you earn a living from doing this.

  1. Commit to Excellence

You need to excel at what you do, always putting your best efforts in. We each have our strengths and particular talents, although often we don’t really know what these are. First you need to determine exactly what you are great at doing and then do what it is, but always strive to improve. My dad said you’re never the finished article, always bring your best forward and know you can get better ‘with age.’ If you were a tennis player you’d never allow yourself to go on court unprepared or unwilling to be at your very best. So strive for excellence at everything you do.

  1. See yourself as responsible for the outcomes.

Nobody is to blame for where you are but yourself. I know this is a hard pill to swallow. When my life collapsed I tried to blame everyone I could for what happened but ultimately I made the choices I did so I was responsible. Only by accepting my own responsibility for everything that happens to me have I been able to rebuild my life and take the actions needed to bring about the outcomes I desire. Knowing if at first I don’t succeed I have to keep trying until I do.

  1. Develop a clear sense of direction

Decide exactly what it is you want. List 12 goals you want to accomplish in the next 12 months, then decide which one goal would have the greatest positive impact in your life. Then make sure you do something every day to work towards this goal. Make sure you take a step forward every single day. This one thing will change everything, its attainment will not just put the biggest smile on your face possible but it will open up all sorts of opportunities to help you change your life to a brilliant one.

  1. Refuse to consider the possibility of failure

There is no such thing as failure only feedback, are words I heard from Brian Tracy, and he is right. I have had more failures than successes, but every success has come from me learning from the mistakes I made and the failures I met. The losers in life are those that don’t try, the winners are those who keep trying, keep fighting and never give up.

  1. Know midlife is a powerful, exciting time

It is the perfect time to look within, discover who you really are, and implement changes. It’s the best time to connect with your true self… that unique, brilliant, magnificent person inside of you who is calling to come forth. It is not a time to accept mediocrity, to wake up every morning in fear and go to bed every night more frustrated than the night before. Reinventing yourself not only makes sense, but it’s your obligation to the world to create the perfect you.

  1. Invest in Yourself

Remembering you’re going to die one day, it’s essential that you make the most of the time you have and do everything in your power to bring out the best that is already within you. So ask yourself a question, if you only had two years left to live what would you do differently? What choices would you make, what dreams would you ensure you fulfilled? Find yourself someone that can help you see through the fog, to manage your stress, to see your options, and to make sound decisions. Let them inspire you to look forward and frankly get excited about the second half of your life, to support you in creating a vision for your midlife and beyond helping you move forwards with greater confidence.

I know for myself that I’m passionate about my role as the Reinvention Coach and love to inspire my clients to embrace the second half of their life helping them to look forward to this new phase in life seeing midlife as a turning point presenting a spectacular opportunity for growth and new beginnings! Invest in yourself because the return in investment will be so worth it. If you want to get unstuck make a huge commitment and investment in your personal development.

If you’re ready to invest in yourself then make contact with me and let’s talk about the alternatives I can offer you.

Just make sure you seek out the way to make the rest of your life the best of your life. You owe it to yourself, your family and your world to put together your brilliant life. Know you can! Know reinventing yourself is simply worth it!

photo credit: judy dean Farming butterflies via photopin (license)

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